“Ubering” evening with Boogman

Unfortunately one of the agents called out sick which means I had to work late tonight. I manage a small call center that is open 24/7 so occasionally I have to rearrange some things personally to cover shifts.

My husband had choir rehearsal so he took the youngest and I decided to take the oldest back to the office for a few hours. Remember from my previous posts that he hasn’t stopped moving and/or talking in almost eight years. Why would I even imagine that this would go smoothly?

His nickname is Boogman or Boogy because he eats boogers. I know…gross. He is finally growing out of it but man… it’s nasty!

Anyway…we have one vehicle at the moment and the church is further away than my job so Boogy and I took an Uber up to the office.

In the backseat of our F150 Uber my son touched every piece of the interior. He opened the vents….shut the vents…and reopened the vents. He told the driver that he was in 2nd grade and was amazing at math.

After we get out of the vehicle I begin my lecture on what we are not going to do in the office. I explain what we are going to do. I confirm he understood the words that came out of my mouth. hahahahahahahaha…

We walk into the lobby and he runs his hands over the couch and proceeds to go into the direction of a globe sitting on an end table.

“Don’t touch that!” – Seriously…we just walked in the door, man.

We make our way to my desk and I instruct him on where he can sit and ask him to plug in my phone. It’s 2015. Yes…I am that parent who uses technology in an effort to distract her child while I cover a shift at work. Don’t judge me 🙂

Whatever he decides to do on the phone will ultimately make noise so I offered him a set of fancy call center headphones that cost approximately $150. He puts them on.

“Ouch! They hurt my head!”

He starts “resizing” them and suddenly I picture myself signing a payroll deduction form to cover the cost of broken company equipment.

He retrieved some things off the printer for me and colored for a few minutes in an extra internal support manual I had laying around before I took a break so we could eat. One of the great things about my job’s location is the Bojangles right next door. We walked over and picked up some food to bring back to my desk. Apparently the inside of a fast food restaurant is fascinating to my child in comparison to the normal process of going through the drive-thru. He loudly proclaimed how wonderful it was.

“This is only the second time I’ve been inside of a Bojangles!”

To the cashier ringing us up…”Wow! You guys have a LOT of great food here! It looks sooooooooooo good!”

After inquiring if his eyesight was somehow impaired when we picked up Bojangles the last 586 times he claimed he couldn’t see the menu from his booster seat.

We move down the counter to wait on our food. Remember… waiting with the Mellix boys is to be avoided if at all possible. I tried to buy some time with getting napkins and straws. Hey! Let’s take our straws out of the wrappers. Let’s find the trash can and throw out the wrappers. Nope… still not ready. He’s standing there…ok wiggling there and we don’t even have our cups yet.

Begin ninja practice is 3….2….1… kerpunch (spit)…kipishhhhh (spit) …highyaaa (spit) …kipishhhh. (spit)!

Please put the chicken in the box! Can I just come back there? I seriously don’t mind at this point but I have to get out of here.

Finally we get our food. Back to work we go.

I accomplished nothing. By the end of the night I had the biggest headache. You know the kind that is on the far right side of your forehead. I can draw exactly where it hurts in a straight line from my hair line to the top of my eyebrow. My right eye doesn’t even want to open.

Spinning desk chairs

Crumbs all over the desk

Where did he go?

I’m going to call your dad

Did that screen say “agent”? OMG…are you a secret agent? You said your job was no fun but it is!!!!

Can we go now? How many more hours?

I have to go to the bathroom.

Can I go in the break room?

Walks over to a co-worker…I can’t wait to be a 4th grader! They get to do archery. That’s bow and arrows 🙂

Finally time to go and we request another Uber to bring us back home. He compliments the driver on his super nice Toyota Camry and asks me if he’s Muhammad Ali after seeing his name on the app. No baby… just the same first name.

As we walk through the breeze way back to our apartment we smile at each other and I said “It was pretty cool Ubering two times with you this evening.”

Not even a real word but that’s okay. I made it another day with my enthusiastic buddy. Gotta love him 🙂

me and isaiah

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