Aaron: “I’m from Charleston.”
Isaiah: “I’m from your mom…ooooohhh!!! Wait…I guess I am because I was in mom’s belly.”
Aaron: “Well, I’m actually from dust. God made me from the dust on the ground.”
Me: “Alright Bishop…”
While sorting through the last mountain of paperwork on my dining room table I rip up a few things into a trashcan beside me.
Aaron: “Are you switching to T-Mobile?”
Me: “No. Why?”
Aaron: “Well people that do get to make that sound.”
(Tearing up higher bills…I’m guessing he’s referring to an advertisement???)
Sir…you’re six. Please resume putting together your 135 piece Marvel Avengers puzzle…also on the dining room table.
Have a good night!
Week 5 of Kindergarten
The excitement is gone. He no longer jumps for joy as he puts on his TMNT shell book bag. He drags his feet down the three flights of stairs from our apartment to the bus stop. By the time I get off from work and pick him up he’s done. More than done. Cranky and disgusted. He wants to eat and then fall out asleep. Continue reading
Aaron: “oohhhh!! I’m Steph Curry…he shoots he scores…”
Super hero toys fly through the air into large plastic bins on the floor. The boys are hard at work cleaning their room…finally.
Isaiah: “Here comes Thomas Jefferson…OOOOOO…he hits a 3-pointer!” Continue reading
Isaiah was recently hired by his father to do dishes. I know…that’s a topic all on its own.
The focus here is Aaron’s meltdown regarding the whole situation.
Aaron: “Isaiah, can I help you with the dishes and then we can split the money?”
Me: “Isaiah are you seriously subcontracting out your one chore. I mean, I guess it’s fine because you’ll do less work and still get some money.”
Isaiah: “No. I don’t need help.”
Aaron: “AAAAHHHHH!!!!!! It’s not fair! I’m never going to catch up to him now!”
Not knowing at this point that daddy told them the $10 Isaiah was offered was a great deal considering the most mommy would ever pay them would be maybe $5.
Once I was brought up to speed the insanity continued.
Me: “Aaron, calm down. I can offer you a job. Stop freaking out and then we can talk.”
Aaron: (hyperventilating in the backseat) “It’s never going to work. I really need to save $300.”
Me: “For what?” (trying my best not to laugh!)
Aaron: “I need to save $300. After that I’m going to save a billion dollars so I can buy whatever I want. I was thinking about buying an island.”
Let’s pause here… what the devil am I supposed to say to that?!?!?
An island, really sir, an island???
Ok…you can do this…get back in there and see if you can help…
Me: “Ok let’s see. At $5 per week that would be a total of $20 per month. At that rate you’ll have the $300 goal met in 1 year and 3 months.”
Aaron: “AAAAHHHHH!!!!” (completely hysterical…)
Me: “Aaron…Aaron…Aaron…………Listen…Aaron! You really need to start thinking creatively if this is going to work.”
Aaron: (finally stops sobbing for a second) “What do you mean?”
Me: “Clearly your salary isn’t going to cut it. Is there anything you can sell? Maybe some toys that you don’t want anymore?”
Aaron: “I think so.”
That’s pretty much as far as we got tonight.
We’ll have to do some further research to figure out where this billion dollars is coming from!
Throwback Thursday is still a thing, right? Well…either way here’s an old one for you.
What’s on the floor at your house?
Wait…am I the only one with a mess? 🙂
Older brother builds tower. Mom sends him to go shower and get dressed. Continue reading
Have you ever tried to make water balloons for the kids in the summertime?
Realistically how many do you have the patience to create while they are impatiently waiting in their swim trunks?
Maybe 25-30? The fun is over in minutes and you have soaking wet kids covered with grass from the front yard.
During my brief visit to my mom’s house this weekend she pulled out a pack of “Bunch O Balloons”. This AMAZING invention advertised it could fill 100 water balloons in 60 seconds. Not only did it fill them but it tied them off too! It’s pure genius.
Wal-Mart currently has them on sale for $14.99. I highly recommend this product. My boys had blast!
I am the only girl in the house. I have my husband, a 6yr old, and a 3 yr old. My boys can drive me absolutely INSANE but at the same time they make me laugh each and every day.
The things my boys say and do are hilarious. The things they make me say and do tend to be more comical though. For example, last week I took them to the fall festival the daycare put together. (Husband was unable to make it due to work) so it was me vs. the two of them.
Justin Bieber and “Let it Go” (Frozen) music created an instant migraine upon my arrival. We walked up to two jump castles and I immediately lost control. Both boys threw their shoes off and off they went. Do you think they stayed together? Of course not.
Let me back up about 10-15 mins. My younger son goes to the daycare full time and the older child just comes after school. When I arrived to pick them up I was given a large plastic bag with stickers and my son’s name all over it and somehow I ended up with my older son’s back pack. So back to the jump castles…
I am wearing my son’s backpack and I have both pairs of sneakers in the decorated plastic bag. I “bounce” back and forth between the two children on different jump castles trying to get them to play on the same one.
Eventually the younger son comes off and I put his shoes on. His friend sits down beside him and I end up tying her shoes as well. Then here comes his older brother…”come on! Let’s go play”
He sprints after him and flings off his shoes into the grass!
Trying not to show my frustration I put the sneakers in the bag and look over to see my boys running away from the jump castles. Thank you God!
Do they stay together? Of course not. One is grabbing a water bottle from a large cooler. (I hope these are for everyone) The younger one is over by the carnival games standing in front of a man holding a bright orange candy bowl. I end up holding the bottled water in the back pack after 2 sips from my wonderful child. He runs off after I took it off his hands and I drag myself over to the one getting candy. He has inspected every piece in the bowl but still struggles to make a decision as the line behind him gets longer and longer. “Come on! Just pick a piece and keep it moving” – finally he grabs a lollipop. Does he put it in the bag? Of course not! He stands there and takes 45 seconds to remove the paper and then starts the “I’m going to be a sticky mess in about 3 minutes” process. Lots of spit, sucking noises, crunches, etc.
I yelled for my other son to come see me about 4-5 times as he ran by me with his little friends and I’m becoming more and more frustrated every moment I’m at this festival.
Why did I come? I knew this was going to happen. To make a very long story short we ended up playing the carnival games and found ourselves on a mini fire truck hayride on the way out. Both boys were told they were grounded from “the phones”. What the heck?!?!? They don’t even have a phone or a job. Why do my boys have my iPhone so much? It’s mine. What happened to board games and Legos? They are here in the house and by that I mean all over the house. Little ninja weapons left out for mommy to get hurt with.
I have to get it right with these boys before it’s too late…
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